Ashleigh Anpilova


Gibbs recalls the first time he gave Ducky flowers.

An established relationship story.

Written: May 2007. Word count: 500.



The first time I gave Duck flowers was over fifteen years ago; it was by accident. I'd gone to see him one evening and decided, on the spur of the moment, to take some flowers for his mom.


When Duck opened the front door, he saw the flowers, beamed up at me, his eyes full of affection, happiness and surprise, took them from me, and thanked me. Thanked me very sincerely.


I didn't have the heart to tell him I'd bought them for his mom, not him. Instead I accepted his thanks, and said it was my pleasure.


Then I got to thinking; why was I so surprised by Ducky's reaction? And why hadn't I taken him flowers before? Okay, so I'm not exactly the roses and chocolates kind of guy, but I've bought my share of flowers in my day for the women in my life. Mostly, I have to admit to try to make up for something I'd done. But sometimes it was just because I cared.


I care for Ducky more than I've ever cared for anyone. Love him more than my own life, and yet I'd never considered giving him flowers. Why?


Was it just because he was another man?


Was I as guilty of stereotyping as those people I despised?


Was I ashamed to show him how much I cared?


Was I afraid he'd laugh at me?


Was it just because I'd never thought of it?


Reckon, to an extent, all those reasons, even, I'm ashamed to admit, the stereotyping, were true. But most of all it has to be 'I'd just never thought of it'.


Once I'd seen how genuinely happy they'd made him, I decided to do it again. Not every time we saw one another, reckon that'd make him wonder what was up. What I'd done and was feeling guilty about. Possibly, in Ducky's convoluted way, he might have thought I was trying to break-up with him.


Didn't even buy them on all special occasions, birthday, anniversary, Valentine's Day; you know the sort of thing. Cause even that would've been habit forming and not right. Least not for us. So I varied it; not just using the special occasions, but also the 'just because' ones.


Didn't always buy the same kind either. Didn't want him to get bored of yellow roses or pink carnations.


Did use the same florists though, as they didn't make a big deal out of it. Didn't try to chat to me and ask about my wife, girl friend, fiancée, whoever. Also didn't go overboard on all the twiddly bits. Nor did they seem the least bit judgmental and disapproving when I inadvertently let slip that the flowers were for another man. Still don't know how that happened; Duck and I don't hide what we are to one another, but even so.


Brought him more than thirty bouquets over the years, and he never tires of getting them. Just as I never tire of giving them to him.



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